Every year on 30 or 31 December , I bring a pen and paper to reflect on the year that is about to become a memory. I prepare a list, a ‘balance sheet’ with all the good, the bad and the ugly. The list includes everything on the personal, financial and professional levels. Things that went well and things that didn’t. Things I had control over and worked hard to achieve , and things that were beyond my control yet affected me negatively or positively. I look at the list and try to add things I am taking for granted but for which I am grateful. I often look for more positive stuff to add to tip the balance in favour of the positive side.
The list informs my New Years resolutions and things that I like to focus on and achieve in the next year. Some personal goals and some professional. I sometimes add a title for the year to come, for example : “Happiness ,Meditation and Focus”… or “Travel, Exploration, and Adventure” … and so on.
This has become my end of year ritual, which takes place just before the new year. I learn a lot about myself from this exercise. I always keep the lists and look at them at the end of each year and then for many years to come. This ritual is enabling me to track my progress , thoughts, and my ‘story’. It helps me to reflect on my life and how I construct the story of my life. What I mean by the story of my life is mainly the key events that defined my life and how I reacted to them.
I noticed that when I am down or anxious or feeling bad about myself , I tend to tell my story in a negative way, which amplifies the negative aspects and shows me as unlucky, unwise or unsuccessful. When I am feeling myself ( which is usually more optimistic and upbeat), I tell the story in a much kinder way whereby I acknowledge the challenges I had to overcome and highlight the positive aspects and achievements. There is more pride and love in this version of the story.
I concluded that I am reflecting on my life in very different ways according to my mood. The more I think about that , the more I discover that events in our life are less important than how we interpret them!
I decided to keep constructing the narrative of my life in a positive light. In a way that is more kind and forgiving to myself and others, to my shortcomings, to people who have disappointed me, to events that affected me negatively, to mistakes I have done without bad intentions, to times when I had to do or say something and I didn’t ….etc. The list can be so long here.
Today I am starting my end of year ritual for 2019 and my mind is telling me the negative version of my story. I am committed to reconstruct my story again and reclaim the positive version of it. I decided to review this past year in a kind, forgiving and a grateful mindset. This post is a reminder for me that I can always choose how to perceive my life and myself and today I choose the positive perspective.
And you, what is your end of year ritual?
Happy 2020 🙂
Anas
For the Journey ... 